Ratings: PG to NC-17 depending on the chapter
Word Count: 2057 (this chapter)
Disclaimer: This isn't real. It's make believe, just for fun.
Warnings: Angst, cursing, sex.
Summary: Some times the road is really long and painful but so worth the bumpy ride.
Authors note: I ship Adommy and this is an Adommy fic. In real life I am all for Adam's and Tommy's happiness. No matter who they might choose to be happy with! I am NOT hating on Sauli, not even in this fic!!
Beta: My wondeful friend I_Glitterz. Thank you so much honey.
”Why the hell did you say THAT?” Adam looked at a furious Tommy, his eyes burning with anger making them dark and dangerous. He was walking around the hotel suite like a caged animal and grinding his teeth together, making the muscle in his jaw stand out. Tommy rarely got angry, but when he did there was always a good reason. But right now Adam thought Tommy was overreacting.
“I didn’t say anything wrong, I am the only exception,” Adam smiled a wicked smile, “unless there is something you aren’t telling me.”
“That isn’t the issue here, is it?” Tommy stopped his movements, and stared at Adam, God he wanted to punch him. His hands curled up in fists along his sides.
“Then by all means Tommy, WHAT is??!” Adam tilted his head and looked at Tommy’s hands as they relaxed again. Tommy crossed his arms across his chest, his hands holding around his biceps. He sighed, the anger was slowly leaving him, he never could stay mad. Not even when it was righteous. Instead he felt frustrated and a little sad.
“The issue here, Adam, is that you said it! And someone is bound to misunderstand that statement! That you weren’t talking about kisses but sex, maybe even love, and don’t get me wrong, I do love you, you know that. I just get tired of defending my sexuality, myself. I don’t mind the stage play…. I love it, I love fooling around with you, on stage. But sometimes I just wish…… that you would shut up and let it pass. I know they ask, but could you just….. not answer?! We’ve talked about it, you promised me!” Adam ran a hand through his black hair. It was a gesture of pure frustration. Okay he fucked up, he could see that. He had made a deal with Tommy, and tonight he didn’t commit to it. He knew that.
This was a discussion they had been through many times, Tommy would never say no to Adam’s suggestions, he would even come up with some of his own, because he truly believed in pushing people’s buttons. And he had fun doing it on stage, he did. Another reason was that as a friend of Adam’s, he didn’t mind stirring up the waters for the gay and lesbians.
But sometimes he felt like he was reduced to being Adam’s boy toy. Sometimes the wondering about if or if not he was gay got to him. Not the question itself, but the feeling of his life being dissected by the media and fans. Sometimes he just wanted to hide away from everything. And tonight was one of these times. Adam’s little rendezvous with the fans just set him off, because Adam had promised not to discuss Tommy’s life when he wasn’t there, and tonight he did.
Adam put his hands in his back pockets and leaned back on his heels. He kept his eyes locked on Tommy’s.
“I’m sorry, Tommy, I wasn’t thinking. She asked if you were a good kisser!! I can’t deny that, but I realize I should have stopped there,” he walked over to where Tommy was standing.
“Forgive me??” he made his best kicked-puppy eyes and flashed his lashes. Tommy couldn’t help himself, he laughed.
“I forgive you, if you give me a hug and buy me a beer at the bar later,” Adam immediately pulled him into his arms, squishing him the best he could. Tommy began to fight him while giggling.
“I said hug me, not kill me you idiot.”
When Tommy entered the bar later that night, his eyes automatically searched for Adam. He found him dancing with some cute twink. They seemed to hit it off. Tommy felt his heart swell as he saw the happy look on Adam’s face. Tommy spotted Isaac too, but at the bar. He walked over and sat down, signaling the bartender.
“Hey,” Isaac sends him a concerned look. He saw Tommy earlier, and he knew that something had pissed him off, but he hadn’t had the chance to ask. Now he wanted to be there for his friend.
“You okay?” he put his hand on Tommy’s shoulder and squeezed it lightly.
”Yeah, he just pissed me off today, but we’re good,” Tommy smiled and took a swing at his beer.
“What pissed you off? You two are always so in sync that it is scary,” Tommy laughed at that, he knew that most people thought that they were an item.
He also knew that Isaac didn’t. Isaac was the only person on the face of the planet that knew how confused he sometimes got about his feelings towards Adam. Sharing a hotel room with a friend like Isaac made Tommy spill his guts in those late night conversations. Isaac was just so easy to talk to, and he could keep things to himself. Tommy treasured that – him.
“Aarr, it was stupid. He told some fan that I was a great kisser and I liked girls, but that he was the only exception. I got mad because –“
“He promised you, yeah I remember that conversation,” Isaac looked over at Adam and laughed.
“Does it matter, though?” Isaac asked. Tommy sends him a look of confusion.
“I mean, people are gonna believe what they want anyway, so does it matter what he said?”
“Hmm, yes and no. Yes, because I don’t feel the need to defend who I am, and I certainly don’t need Adam to do so. I hate labels in all shapes. It kills individuality, the uniqueness every person has. And no, because it doesn’t matter what they think, I don’t care…..the people close to me know me, my core, and that matters. I will never have to explain or label anything with you guys. So far, I’m a straight dude, but if I meet a guy and I want to fuck him, you guys will never judge me for that,” as he said that, his eyes wandered to Adam. Isaac smiled knowingly. Stupid, stupid boys.
The bus stopped and the Glamily began to pack their stuff for the night. Adam was on the couch, Tommy curled in under his right arm, resting his head on Adam’s chest. Monte looked in the guy’s direction.
“You’re coming?” Adam nodded and smiled.
“In a minute,”
“Is he sleeping?” Montes voice filled with awe.
“Yep,” Adam let out a soft laugh.
“It never stops to amaze me how he can sleep anywhere anytime, I envy his ability to do so.”
Monte sounded as if he really meant it, Adam couldn’t blame him. The rest of the band often had problems sleeping on an ever moving bus or airplane. Adam let his knuckles run down Tommy cheek.
“Wake up babe,” Tommy didn’t even move, not one sign showing that he heard Adam. So he did it again, and this time he shifted his weight a little too.
“Tommy, we are at the hotel…….wake up,”
“Noooo, let me sleep,” Tommy whined, readjusting so he fitted perfect onto Adam’s body again.
“Babe, in five minutes you can be in a comfy bed, beats the shit out of this,” Adam smiled at Tommy’s attempt to sneak back to sleep.
“But I’m comfy…… and warm,” Still whining, which made Adam laugh softly. Damn, he was cute like this. But Adam wanted to get into the hotel room, needed a little privacy and a fucking bath, so he had to get Tommy moving.
“Yeah, but you won’t be when I leave!” it has half a joke, half the truth.
“Then don’t leave, stay with me, keep me warm…..” Tommy snuggled closer, nuzzling Adam’s neck and inhaled his unique scent before he kisses the skin just below the jaw, “…..and comfy,” Adam’s breath hitched. Damn you, Tommy Joe, every fucking time! Not fair. Good thing he doesn’t know, that would probably ruin a pretty awesome friendship. Adam sighed.
“Alright, I’ll make you a deal, you get up now and get your things, wait,” Adam stopped Tommy as he tried to say something, “and you can sleep in my bed the next couple of hours,” Tommy smiled against Adam’s chest.
“Hm, what’s in it for you??” Tommy stood up, stretching his body, arms over his head, his t-shirt lifted, revealing the skin on his stomach, Adam swallowed. He shook his head, clearing his thoughts.
“I don’t get an unmotivated bass player with a cold, because he was too lazy to stay warm, so I win too! Now MOVE IT!!!” Adam made his best boss face.
“Hey, hey I’m going!” Tommy blew Adam a kiss and went to collect his stuff.
Adam opened the door, but somehow Tommy was the first in the room, he always seems to move silent and quickly. The only reason Adam always knows when Tommy is near is this tingly feeling along his spine that follows Tommy’s presence. Tommy was checking out the room and when his eyes land on the bed, his face lit up in a huge smile, lighting the room up. He dumped the suitcase on the floor.
“So what do you want to do tonight…?” Tommy flopped down on Adam’s bed, right in the middle off it. Adam sat down and looked at Tommy in amusement. Tommy smiled widely.
“Because I was kinda thinking we could hang out here, maybe watch a movie, have a sleepover??” he laughed softly as he moved over to where Adam has sitting, putting his head on Adam’s lap. He closed his eyes in contentment. Being like this! That’s what makes life worth living. When Adam let his fingers run through his hair, he almost moaned out loud. God his fingers were magic.
Adam smiled at Tommy’s expression. The little kitty looked like he was about to purr.
“Love to babe, have plans though. You can’t stay in my bed tonight night, I promised you a couple of hours, which is it for today!” Tommy could hear the smile in Adam’s voice, infectious that smile, made Tommy’s lips curl too.
“You’re kicking me out,” it was a statement, not a question.
“Kinda, remember the guy I meet in Finland??” Tommy felt how his body tensed, this couldn’t be good. Not good at all. He sat up looking at Adam, hoping desperately that his ears deceived him. He could handle that, not hearing.
“Yeah I do,” Tommy sounded guarded, and if Adam had paid attention he would have noticed that. But he was excited about his date.
“We have been keeping contact, flirting a lot!” Adam’s eyes sparkled, and Tommy felt it as anger and resentment filled his body, but Adam was unaware of Tommy’s inner turmoil.
”And he is here…. So I got a hot date!” Adam’s voice pitched in joy. Tommy almost jumped off the bed; he had to get out of here. He felt like he couldn’t breathe and his fucking knees trembled, traitors! He fought his anger to the best of his ability but his voice came out sharp and low.
“Was that really necessary??” Adam looked puzzled.
“Huh?” the expression on Adam’s face made it damn near impossible not to explode and even though Tommy really didn’t want to say anything, his stupid mouth decided to spit out.
“To shove it in my face like that?”
“What the fuck?” Adam pulled a hand through his hair, he didn’t understand anything. What the hell did he do? Why was Tommy acting like a……total dick. Tommy glared at him, as he lifted the suitcase off the floor. Damn it he looked pissed, his eyes got all dark and….. hurt? Adam really didn’t understand and the frustration he felt almost made him angry too.
“I’m….. I’m gonna go, just got to…….I’ll be in my room, with Isaac.” Tommy’s voice dripped with venom.
“Oh….. and have a fucking great date!” Tommy hissed as he yanked at his suitcase and stamped out the door.
“What the hell Tommy?” Adam yelled behind him. But all Tommy knew was, he had to get out of there before he said something utterly stupid, like how he really felt. Damn that would most likely ruin everything.
“Tommy?!” he kept walking, he had too. His head was spinning, his stomach twisted, and by God, his heart was bleeding out. So this was how it felt? To get your heart broken to pieces.