Title: The Boy Next Door.
Word Count: ~10.500
Pairing: Adam/Tommy (high school AU).
Disclaimers: The people you might recognize in here are NOT mine. I'm not making any profit, I'm only doing this for fun. There is no way this ever happened and so on.
Beta: jamie2109. Thank you sweetie for all your help!
Type: Romance with just enough angst to make it good.
A/N: I had some really incredible cheerleaders on this fic!!! I love you all dearly! And I couldn’t have done it without you! So THANK YOU!!!
Summary: Adam watched the removal van drive up and park in front of the house, he watched people running back and forth with boxes and furniture, like busy ants, until it was all unloaded onto the front lawn. His eyes kept drifting back to the teenage boy who looked a little lost and a whole lot pissed as he was walking up to the house with sports-bags in both hands and a guitar case slung over his shoulder. He was glaring up at his new home and biting his lower lip.
The kid disappeared into the house but Adam saw him again in the room that faced his own. Their eyes met across gardens and Adam knew, fucking knew, that his life would never be the same. Gorgeous brown eyes looked back at him, a sad expression caught in them.
Adam’s heart clenched at the sadness and instantly wanted to make the boy feel better. He flipped the page on the notebook he was writing lyrics in and wrote a hasty ‘you ok?’ on it and held it up to the window for the kid to see……
Please do not link/copy/share/whatever this anywhere. Thank you.
5 MONTHS EARLIER.
Tommy stayed over for dinner, like usual, and they went upstairs after helping with the dishes to get their homework done.
“Damn it! I’ll never learn this! I just don’t get the ‘logic’. How the hell is math ‘logic’ anyway?”
Adam looked up from his own math books and frowned when Tommy tossed his book into the corner with a frustrated sigh.
“Hmm. I thought you did good in all your classes.”
“I do okay but argh, I just don’t-”
“You’re sure it’s the math bugging you? You’ve been like this for the last month.”
Adam packed away his books and shoved them into his backpack. He flopped down on his bed where Tommy was sprawled out staring up at the ceiling, and keeping quiet. Adam nudged Tommy’s side with an elbow.
“Hey what’s up with you? You know I’ll listen, right?”
Tommy sighed and left the bed to pick up his math book and put it back in his backpack.
“Nothing. It’s nothing,” he huffed out, sounding like all hope for a good and bright future had left him. Adam didn’t really want to know what he was about to ask, but Tommy clearly needed to get something of his chest and being best friends meant that Adam would have to suck it up.
“You’re having girl problems? Did I do it again? Zone out when you talked girls? I mean, I know you’re crushing on someone.”
Tommy turned around slowly and caught Adam’s gaze briefly before making his way back to Adam’s bed. He sat down on the edge of the bed and picked a little at a cuticle before stuttering through something of an answer. Adam really didn’t like the nervous behavior at all.
“No, um maybe, sorta?”
Feeling guilty for being a lousy friend, Adam moved so he sat next to Tommy, so close that their thighs touched. He took hold of Tommy’s hands and began apologizing. “Oh, I’m sorry, I swear, Tommy, I didn’t mean to.” Adam watched in wonder when that actually made Tommy smile and relax a bit.
“No, doofus. I meant that I sorta have a crush on someone. Um, actually it might be more than that, like…” Tommy paused and looked down at their joined hands and Adam held on a little tighter, ignoring the warm tingling feeling his skin created every time it touched Tommy’s.
“Like what?” Adam asked while he was begging in his head for Tommy not to say ‘in love’.
Tommy sneaked a peek up at Adam through his bangs, and Adam wanted to put a finger under his chin to lift it to meet his eyes properly. But Tommy looked away fast and went back to stare at their hands. When he finally spoke, his voice was barely a whisper and Adam had to listen really hard to make out the words.
“Like, I think I am in love, really in love, and this person has no clue and I don’t even know,” Tommy broke off and bit his bottom lip. Adam’s heart dropped to his stomach and he released Tommy’s hands and pushed off the bed. He needed a little distance before he could continue. Looking out the window, his back to Tommy he asked, “Know what, Tommy?”
“If, um, if I should try to make a move.”
“Oh.” Adam breathed out and wanted to punch something. He certainly didn’t want to keep this conversation going. Tommy didn’t say anything after that and Adam put on his best poker-face before turning to face him again.
“Well maybe you should just go for it,” he said with a little shrug, going for casual. Huge brown eyes looked at him, shining with insecurity.
“Yeah? ‘Coz it could screw up a pretty amazing friendship.”
That hit Adam right in solar plexus, and he suddenly saw all the little signs clearly, all the ways Tommy had seemed drawn to Mia more lately.
“Oh! You’re in love with Mia?! Wow. Why didn’t I see that one coming?”
Tommy shook his head and sighed heavily. “No, not Mia. Listen, Adam, I don’t really wanna talk about it. Could we just, I dunno, watch a movie or something?”
Adam could have cried in relief. “Yeah, sure. What do you wanna watch?”
Tommy smiled that rare little smile that Adam always thought of as the perfect mixture of pleasure and pain. “Dunno. Don’t care, just pick one.”
So Adam found a movie he knew they would both enjoy, and got comfortable against the headboard. He kind of expected Tommy to cuddle the moment he touched the mattress, like he usually did, but he didn’t. Instead, he rolled onto his stomach facing the TV, feet up and crossed by the ankles, chin in his hands.
“Why are you down there? In five minutes you’re gonna be cold because you’re lying still, and you know I’m like a furnace.” Adam cursed at himself the moment it was out of his mouth. Why was he such an idiot? Asking for cuddles was like carrying wood to the fire.
“Dunno, just felt like it,” Tommy said without taking his eyes from the TV. Adam was equally relieved and miserable.
It didn’t take long before Tommy started to rub his feet together though. Adam made a little knowing sound.
“Don’t say it,” Tommy said immediately, and Adam snorted.
Ten minutes later Tommy was curled against Adam's side with a blanket pulled loosely around them. Tommy pushed a cold hand in between Adam’s crossed thighs, and Adam had to suck in a startled breath. Damn that hand was close to where Adam really, like really, wanted it.
“Sorry,” Tommy whispered and nuzzled Adam’s collarbone. Tommy's thumb stroked Adam’s thigh in a completely maddening way, and Adam, who had been hot for Tommy for months, wanted nothing more than for that hand to go a bit higher up his legs.
“It’s fine, you’ll be warm in a minute,” Adam got out. He was getting hotter by the second with liquid heat boiling lazily in his veins where his body touched Tommy’s.
“Hmmm. I know.”
Tommy’s eyes seemed to be glued to the TV, but he kept wiggling a little, which was killing Adam softly, and to make him stop Adam hooked his index finger into one of the belt loops on Tommy's jeans. Tommy squirmed a little more and suddenly Adam was connected with warm skin under his thumb. They both tensed and stayed still, and Adam swore to himself that he was not gonna move his fingers, but Tommy went pliant and Adam’s thumb got a life of its own and started to caress the soft skin at Tommy’s waist.
For a while they stayed that way, but then Tommy moved his hand a little, a bit closer to Adam’s cock, and the liquid heat was not so lazy anymore. In no time it became a lake of fire.
Tommy made a comment on the movie, and Adam thanked the powers of the universe that he'd decided on a movie he knew by heart. Because there was no way his brain could wrap around a plot with Tommy’s hand touching him like that at the same time. Tommy moved again, restless, and snuck his hand under the hem of Adam’s t-shirt and spread it out on Adam’s skin. Adam, thank fuck, managed to swallow the moan.
"Is this okay?" Tommy whispered, his head tilted onto Adam's shoulder so he whispered right in his ear making Adam shiver.
"Is-" he said. He was so fucking turned on that he couldn’t think, well that wasn't entirely true because his brain was very focused on how close Tommy was, and on how it would be to kiss those lips that were only a few inches from his own. And the hand under Adam’s t-shirt sure supplied mental images enough for hours of jerking off.
“God, how are you so deliciously warm all the time?” Tommy purred. And Adam just didn’t give a damn anymore, so why not make a fucking joke out of his current state of mind, and body obviously. “‘Coz you keep me hot and bothered?”
Tommy snorted, and it came out a little too forced, in Adam’s opinion, but he didn’t know what to make of it.
“Oh shut up. Don’t say shit like that when you don’t mean it. Nobody likes a tease.”
Adam heard the unhappiness, and against all his good intentions of never revealing how hot he thought Tommy was, then when he opened his mouth what came out was, “You don’t think I find you attractive?”
“No.” Tommy sighed.
Adam’s brain to mouth filter was gone by then and he stared at Tommy, who stubbornly kept his eyes on the TV. “Oh. Um do you want me to?”
Adam felt Tommy’s body go rigid and it was several seconds before Tommy answered. When he did look up at Adam, it was with a look that Adam could only think of as vulnerable, like Tommy could break into a million pieces. Adam held his breath, waiting.
Adam tried to get his head in the game because this meant that Tommy was what? Interested? In him? No fucking way was this really happening because that would be like asking for miracles and Adam didn’t really believe in those. But then Tommy lowered his gaze and started to pull away from Adam and Adam realized that this was really happening and he hadn’t said anything to Tommy yet. Filled with awe of what he just discovered he whispered softly, “Shit. I-”
“See? I knew it, fuck. Why did I even-” Tommy was moving really fast at that point to get some space between them, but Adam was fast enough, mainly because Tommy was tangled in the blanket, to stop him with a hand on his neck.
“Shut up. And let me finish, okay?!” Tommy nodded wide eyed, and started to chew on his lip. Adam knew this nervous trait so very well and he wanted to get his wording right this time, so without caring about sounding like a total girl he just laid it on the line for Tommy.
“Um, I think you’re gorgeous and sexy as hell. You’re small and delicate and you fit, like made for me fit. I love your eyes, they tell everything about you and they have this amazing ability to change color depending on your mood and the light.” Adam took one of Tommy’s hands in his own and laced their fingers together. “You have these long slim fingers there are so much stronger than they look, and I just,” Adam swallowed and met Tommy’s eyes and he lost completely track of his thoughts when he saw the heat in them.
“You just?” Tommy asked, needy. Adam’s heart tried to pound its way out of his chest because Tommy’s eyes kept darting down to Adam’s lips when he spoke, as if he really wanted to kiss him. And boy was Adam on board with that. “I just want them on me, touching.” Tommy slid closer, eyes locked on Adam’s mouth while darting his tongue out to wet his own. Adam didn’t try to hold back the moan that slipped out, and the sound made Tommy raise his gaze to lock it on Adam’s again.
“And then there’s your lips. Yeah, I love those.”
“Yeah. I definitely love those.”
“Enough for me to kiss you?” Tommy’s voice was low and soft, and somehow Tommy snuck a leg across Adam’s and then he was straddling him. Maddeningly slowly, Tommy leaned in to kiss Adam.
“Please do that,” Adam whispered right before Tommy’s lips finally touched his. The kiss was dry, and warm, and innocently sweet but it still made Adam tremble. Tommy pulled back just enough to look at Adam and a small smile played on his lips. Adam asked, “You sure you want this?” trying to keep the joy out of his voice and failing. Tommy just looked at Adam with the same heat as before, leaving his eyes dark and clouded. Adam basked in the knowledge that he was the one making Tommy look like that. Tommy cradled Adam’s face and leaned in again and murmured against Adam’s lips. “Um, can I just? I want to-”
Adam loved the way Tommy’s lips felt against his, soft and warm, and all kinds of awesome.
“I wanna keep kissing you.” Tommy purred. And then Adam was being thoroughly kissed again and, as a direct result, his body tingled all over, pure heat pooling in his groin and stomach making him impossibly hard. He got his hands lost in blond hair when the kiss deepened and tongues met in an ancient and slow dance. The kiss went on forever and Adam got lost in it, and when it came to an end they stared at each other for a while, fingers traveling slowly, possessively, over cheekbones, necks and shoulders.
“That was my first kiss,” Adam said in wonder, and Tommy beamed.
“Was it okay?”
“Awesome! Please don’t stop kissing me.”
“I’ll keep kissing you for as long as you want me to.”
Tommy grinned and kissed Adam again, slow and sensual, and Adam felt like he was cracked open and floated feely bursting with love.
Adam touched his lips thinking back on that evening, on their first kisses, on the first time Tommy made him cream his pants, on kissing Tommy good night on the porch, on his mom’s knowing smile when he went inside again and wasn’t able to wipe the ridiculously happy smile of his face.
There was a scratching noise, like the phone was being passed over, and Adam’s heart almost stopped when Tommy’s voice reached him.
For a minute Adam had no idea what to say, how to begin. He hadn’t really expected Tommy’s voice to be there at all.
“Can I come over?” Adam asked hurriedly. He heard Tommy inhale before exhaling hard and Adam knew the answer before Tommy answered.
“No. I don’t want to drag Mia’s family into our break up more than they already are.”
Adam closed his eyes and with a broken sound he begged, “Break up? Tommy, please? Please, don’t do that, not before we’ve talked, before I’ve told you why-”
“Adam. You really think I want to know why? I don’t need to know why I wasn’t enough!”
“Enough- You’re my everything! Everything! I need you,” Adam cried out.
“It really didn’t look like that, Adam.” Adam could hear that Tommy was about to cry, his voice trembled and Adam hated it. And he swore to himself that if Tommy ever forgave him this then it would be the absolute last time he would be the reason for Tommy’s tears.
“But if you’ll let me explain. Please let me explain.”
Tommy sighed. “Okay, Adam. I’ll come home after school tomorrow; you can do your talking thing there. But don’t…” Tommy’s voice broke and he stopped talking.
“Don’t what?” Adam asked softly.
“It’s, I don’t even know why I bother. Um, that’s not true I know why, because I love you. The thing is that you don’t love me. Shit! I know you do but not the same way, and that was fine, I was okay with that but I can’t be with someone that wants to be with someone else. Not even if you need me to.”
“What?” Adam couldn’t keep the shock out of his voice. Tommy didn’t think he loved him? Adam damn well knew that he hadn’t said it, but he showed Tommy in every way he could think of.
“Brad-” Tommy began but Adam interjected right away.
“You don’t think I want to be-” Tommy didn’t let him finish though.
“Not once since we got together have you said you love me, not once, Adam. I understand that I maybe say it too easily or maybe too lightly, but you used to throw me a ‘love you too’ bone when we were friends. Now I only get it on paper or text messages. And then I see you kissing Brad. I’m not leaving your life Adam, I wouldn’t know how to, but I’ll back off and let you go after Brad if that’s what you want, but please don’t use me as a doormat. I deserve better.”
“I know I haven’t said it and that’s why,” Adam paused, this wasn’t going well, not at all. “Oh gods. Can we not do this over the phone? I want to be able to see you when we talk.”
“Yeah. Tomorrow.” Tommy agreed and Adam heard him wipe his eyes and sniff.
“Thank you. And, Tommy? I promise it was nothing.”
After saying good night to his family and curling up in his bed under the comfort of his duvet, Adam lay there thinking about what Tommy had said, and realized that he had fucked up way worse than he thought. But he was going to straighten things out tomorrow, he was going to tell Tommy why and he was going to show and tell him just how much he loved him. He was done being scared of how important Tommy was to him, done being scared finding ‘the one’ at the age of seventeen and of the possibility of being left by that one.
Adam had been sleeping restlessly for a couple of hours when he woke up to the sound of pebbles against his window. With his heart in his throat he climbed out of bed and looked down on the lawn, and fuck him sideways, Tommy Joe was down there. Adam opened the window, struggling a bit with the locks, and cursing his stupid trembling hands. But finally he got the window up and Tommy’s sweet voice reached him, “Can I come up?”
“You wanna?” Adam asked, not really enough awake to grasp that Tommy was really there, wanting to talk.
“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”
Adam saw Tommy find the spare key and wave it at him before running around to the front door, and Adam finally realized that Tommy was going to be up in a second. He spun around and looked at his bed, warm and cozy, and down himself, shirtless, only wearing a pair of pajama bottoms. He went to his closet to find a T-shirt, not wanting to feel exposed. It was kind of silly because in the five months they had been boyfriends, Tommy had seen Adam’s bare chest numerous times.
But then Tommy was in his room, looking at him and the task of finding a t-shirt was forgotten.
“I talked to Brad,” Tommy said, moving closer.
“Oh. Why?” Adam was fairly sure if he had seen Tommy kiss Mia he wouldn’t have talked to her, ever again.
“Um, Mia said that it might be a good idea, and I guess I was,” Tommy paused, searching for the right word, “curious and pissed enough.”
“I think I understand now. I’m not saying it was okay. You hurt me! But he explained a couple of things and yeah.” Tommy eyed the bed and with a little nod towards it he asked permission to sit. Adam smiled and Tommy sat down.
“I know. I never meant to.” Adam sat down next to Tommy, wanting to touch but scared to do so.
“So, um I still kinda need to hear it from you Adam. Why? Why were you-?”
“So scared? To be honest, I don’t know anymore. This day considered it seems so stupid. I guess I love you so much that it scares me. You’ve been the center of my life ever since that first day you moved in next door. I’m terrified that it’ll end then what? And you-” Adam stared at the wall across the room; trying to find the words to dig him out of this hell hole.
“I?” Tommy asked.
“Remember when you broke up with Nina?” Adam twisted his fingers and sneaked a quick glance at Tommy, who was looking at Adam’s hands.
“You were like, head over heels for her one day and the next you’re telling me that maybe it’s a good thing she dumped you; you were kinda, I don’t know, cold? You didn’t really seem all that sad.”
Adam saw Tommy nod thoughtfully in the corner of his eye.
“I wasn’t. She was right you know, I was so hung up on you and it wasn’t really fair to her. But she wanted to be with me and she made me feel good, and I loved that, not that it’s an excuse or anything. But when she ended it I had to admit she was right. That there was only one person that could own my heart, you.”
“It just scared me how easily you let go, and I kept wondering if I, um, if you would let me go just as easily, and if I could ever love again if you did.”
“Oh. Wow. So you what? Wanted to test me?” Tommy sounded like he was getting angry again, so Adam tried to explain.
“No, it wasn’t like that. I’ve been talking to Brad about it and he was telling me that I was stupid, that you loved me and I know that you do! But it kinda made me think about how unrealistic it sounds to find your soulmate when you haven’t even kissed anyone else.”
“Okay?” Tommy dragged the word out and Adam could hear some of the anger had disappeared, replaced with suspicion and maybe curiosity. “So what? You wanted to kiss others?”
Adam startled when he felt Tommy’s hand softly curl around his. Adam twined their fingers together, it felt so right and he started to believe that maybe this could work out. He lifted his head and met Tommy’s eyes. They still looked hurt, but the small smile Tommy tried to offer urged him to go on.
“Actually that was Brad’s idea. He said something along the line of, ‘Oh my fucking God, just kiss me. Tommy and I are just the same type, see if you feel anything, which you won’t, ‘coz I didn’t hang your moon, and then accept the fact that you’re gonna grow old, fat and ugly with Tommy, and he’ll still worship your ass then.’”
Tommy’s face broke into a genuine smile and Adam’s heart decided to add a few beats to its normal rhythm.
“He said that?”
“Yeah, and I was like ‘fuck him’ and went for it.” Adam shrugged, “You weren’t supposed to see it, but I did intend to tell you about it. I never ever meant to hurt you. We went outside because he was right, and I needed to get my head out of my ass and just trust that you wouldn’t dump me in the near future. All the way home I was planning to sweep you off your feet and seduce the hell out of you and then tell you just how much I love you! But when I came over and you were already crying and packing and-”
“Tell me now,” Tommy said softly.
“Um.” Adam furrowed his brows not really knowing what Tommy wanted him to say, but then the open and expecting look in Tommy’s eyes made him understand. He cradled Tommy’s face and said,“I love you Tommy Joe. You own my heart, body and soul.”
“Thank fuck. It wasn’t that hard, was it?” Tommy breathed out, beaming at him, making him wonder why on earth he had been so scared to say it. It had never been hard when they were just friends.
“No,” Adam said and kissed Tommy thoroughly.”Wanna stay?” he asked between kisses that quickly became heated and hungry.
“I’d like that.”
Next morning Adam woke up to Tommy’s warm body snuggled around him, bottle blond hair tickling his nose and his mother’s warm smile as she pushed the door ajar to tell him it was time to get up and get to school.
“I see you two made up.”
Tommy stretched and yawned before opening his eyes, and Leila laughed fondly when Tommy cuddled closer to Adam and offered her a low, “good morning.”
“Do I want to know what you two were up to last night?”
Adam groaned, Tommy snickered and Leila shook her head a little.
“Yeah, thought so. Get dressed and come down prepared for the most embarrassing talk of your lives. See you in ten, boys,” she said before closing the door behind her.
“Oh fuck,” the boys said in unison.